Fun with SPAM! #7

June 6, 2019 Spam 46

I’m excited to say that spammers have figured out ways around those pesky checkboxes in the comments section, and I now have plenty of new material for these spam posts again! So…

It’s time for a new installment of Fun with SPAM, where we peek into the abyss of the Spam folder to find a few gems and imagine … what if I were really going to reply to these random crazy comments? 

Take a look at what I might say:


Very good post. I will be experiencing some of these issues as well.

How interesting! I’m checking over my bite-sized reviews in the post you commented on, trying to guess which issues you’re going to be experiencing. Are you going deaf and planning to track down a whale? Moving to a seaside town filled with magical creatures? Developing synesthesia and you’re afraid your parents have been murdered? Planning to escape a lunar queen who’s intent on taking over Earth?

Whatever it is, I’m glad you found some resources here to help you deal with your (possibly dire) future!

 

I am not really good with English but I line up this real easy to read.

See, I like to be accessible to all my readers, even those of you who can’t really read English. That’s why I line my posts up so well. Everyone knows straight lines are much easier to read.

 

Hello. I have checked your feedyourfictionaddiction.com and i see you’ve got some duplicate content so probably it is the reason that you don’t rank hi in google. But you can fix this issue fast. There is a tool that creates content like human, just search in google: miftolo’s tools

It’s so nice that there is a tool that can create content just like a human. I’m sure it will do a much better job than me, a mere sub-human. I’ll be doing that Google search right away.

 

You made some good points there. I checked on the internet for additional information about the issue and found most people will go along with your views on this website.

I am so thankful to you for verifying that most people agree with me on signing up for the 2015 Book Blog Discussion Challenge. I thought my viewpoint on the subject might be much more controversial, especially now that some time has passed.

 

Help. I am looking for guide

Well, you have come to the right place. I will guide you through the world of books!

 

This is the best guest post I’ve read in 2015 (never mind it’s the only one). THIS IS FULL OF SO MUCH WIN. And life makes SO MUCH MORE SENSE NOW. Of course junk food was invented by the devil. It’s all his fault anyway. Trying to make us humans into creatures who will do the devil’s bidding for junk food. That would explain why devil’s food cake is called devil’s food cake. *scratches head* and MAYBE that’s why junk food is so unhealthy for us.

Wow! I feel so honored to have a time traveler among my readers. I mean, you could be off somewhere changing history and instead you’ve traveled from 2015 to read my blog (and only mine, apparently). IT TRULY BOGGLES THE MIND!!

Your comments about junk food concern me, though. Is this some sort of warning? Have you traveled to a distant future where junk food has been humanity’s undoing? Guess I should stop worrying so much about climate change and focus on what’s really important.

 

Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one! It’s on a entirely different topic but it has pretty much the same layout and design. Excellent choice of colors!

Um, wow, well that does seem pretty incredible since my blog header was created by an artist friend of mine (the lovely Tabitha Jensen) who painted the pic by hand and then I scanned it in and edited it digitally. What a … coincidence?

 

Thasnks for every other great article. The place else could anyone get that type of info in such an idea manner of writing?

I have a presentation next week, and I’m on the search for such info.

You’re very astute. I’d agree that my blog has about a 50/50 track record—every other post is really great! And I’m always interested to see so many people researching things like my discussion challenge (oddly, another commenter said this exact same thing, only with different typos—so many coincidences today!). I’d love to see the presentation you’re giving on the challenge—I’m sure it’s very informative!

 

Hi there to all, how is the whole thing, I think every one is getting more from this site, and your views are pleasant designed for new users.

The whole thing is doing great; thanks for asking! I’m so glad everyone’s getting more from this site than I am—I can honestly say that I’m getting a whole lot. And I always try to pleasantly design my views (what can I say, I’m a people pleaser).

 

What’s up Dear, are you really visiting this website daily, if so after that you will without doubt obtain pleasant knowledge.

Believe it or not, I really am visiting this website pretty much daily. I mean, it is my blog, so it makes sense, right? I guess this is how I’ve obtained the pleasant knowledge in order to share my pleasant views. I just know the world is better for it! Talk to you later, dear!


See, spam really can be fun! If you liked this post, check out my past spam posts—they’re good for a laugh!

Do you ever read your spam? Does it make you laugh? Remember any crazy spam comments? I want to know!

 

46 Responses to “Fun with SPAM! #7”

  1. kindlemom1

    LOL! I love your responses!
    I’ve noticed more spam lately as well which is so frustrating but I like your style LOL. Maybe I should fins more humor in them as well. 😉

  2. Afoma

    LOL Hilarious! I should take a peek in my spam folder for a good laugh too.

    Afoma| afomaumesi.com

  3. Mary Kirkland

    Your responses are hilarious! Spammers are really something else though. I love how they’ll come, leave a weird comment and a spammy link and think it won’t get deleted. In the trash they go.

    Mary Kirkland recently posted: Old Postcards
    • Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

      I know, my daughter kept asking me what the point of spam comments is. She said, “Do they really think someone’s going to read that randomness and then be like, ‘Oh, yes, this sounds like a great person; I’ll definitely click on that link.’?” LOL!

  4. Tanya @ Girl Plus Books

    Too bad you don’t rank “hi” on Google like a real human, Nicole. LOL But I’m still a little concerned about that junk food from the devil thing. I’ll think twice the next time I open up that bag of Doritos.

  5. Brooke Lorren

    This was funny! Makes me want to go into my spam folder and do a post like this too. I’m sure there’s plenty of material in there. Fortunately, AKISMET does a wonderful job and gets rid of most of them.

    Brooke Lorren recently posted: Ghosts of the Shadow Market
  6. Kristen @ Metaphors and Moonlight

    Oh no, let’s hope that person isn’t going to be experiencing any of those issues lol. “Help. I am looking for guide” is my new favorite spam comment. But I do find your views and your knowledge pleasant, so I guess those two weren’t wrong!

  7. Leah

    This is amazing! I’ve found some weird spam comments in the comment dashboard, and I’m always thinking, “Whaaaaaat?” when I read them. Thoughts on our use of grammar and punctuation, sales pitches for diet pills, “reps” from other countries who want to learn English. What a time to be alive!

  8. Isabelle @ BookwyrmBites

    spam comments are a minefield of laughs indeed! I love your snarky replies, and I had so much fun playing “bot or human?” with these comments.

    I just popped into my own spam queue to check, and found this gem on a mini-reviews post: “What last name do you prefer the very best? West or Windsor? West Windsor” honestly I’m baffled as to what this means, but the possibilities may keep me up tonight, LOL.

    Isabelle @ BookwyrmBites recently posted: Mini-Reviews, Volume 3
  9. Emma @ Words And Peace

    Hilarious! But what’s your secret for getting fun spam?? I don’t often check it, but when I do, I mostly either get porn links or huge articles on whatever. Not fair, I can’t even have fun with spam

  10. Nicole @ BookWyrmKnits

    So fun! Spam comments can be a blast to review, as long as they’re safely in the spam filter first. I particularly like the “every other great article” one. 😀

    I recently did a spam post (in which you linked me to your series, thank you!) and then found there was a spam comment on my spam post complimenting me on “some very good points.” Made me laugh. 🙂

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